Sunday, March 21, 2010

Daddy

The recent passing of my father on March 4, "Daddy", as I all called him, has had a profound affect on me spiriutally to put into action my beliefs as I know them. I do believe we are all spiritual beings on this earth walking around as men and women trying to remember our lifes purpose for being here and living the life that we are spiritually suppose to live. I know that when my Daddy passed his spirit could still be felt in the room as we all were there with him to talk, touch and say our final goodbyes to his physical body. I grieved the loss of this man I knew as Daddy for many years with the disease of Alzheimer's. I knew that having this disease, he was between two world's. I know that his spirit would float in and float out of his body and you could always look in his eyes and see when this was happening. He would have a far away look, not there and I knew that he was out of his physical body. And then there were the times of lucidity and you knew he was grounded in his body. I have already experienced moments of his presence around me and knew that he was there. And yet knowing all of this and believing in life after death, I still have such a heavy feeling in my heart, the only way to describe this feeling is that my heart is broken. I know that in time, my heart will not feel as heavy. And I will be able to focus on how lucky I am to have my Daddy always watching over me. He already tells me that he is right here in my heart and will always be there. All I have to do is call his name and listen.
My sister told me that she thought about all of her siblings and the qualities that we each got from Daddy. She felt that I got the quality of always following my heart. Doing things sometimes that I could not explain, but knew that I had to do it. Daddy was that way. He would just tell us that he wanted to, or felt he needed to. This I can relate to because it's so much a part of who I am. He was also superstitious, as I am. My Daddy loved his family and loved the rituals that families create. He was strong on keeping those connections. So when I think about the gifts that I was given from my Daddy, I think of how I take care of my kids, and encourage them to live their lives and to make things happen that they want, and to work hard. These are gifts that I got from this man I called Daddy.
I know that my Daddy was a spiritual being that came from heaven, and walked on this earth as man, with a soul purpose. One of which I believe was to be my Daddy.
Hugs and Blessing to you Daddy!

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